THE TWENTY-THIRD CUPCAKE

My doctor is my shepherd; I shall not weigh more.
He maketh me to lie down in green sweatpants;
he ordereth me to do situps.
He specify-eth my goal.
He sendeth me down jogging trails of endless length for my heart's sake.

Yea, though I stroll by the door of the bakeshop, I will not enter
my sweetrolls and crumcakes I secretly buy elsewhere.

I eatest my cupcakes in the presence of no one.
I feast on rich Twinkies and Ding-Dongs.
My cup's full of ice cream.

Surely huge hips and thunder thighs will haunt me all the days of my life,
and I will live in a body of cellulite forever.

--Ann Luna

quote from Barbara Johnson:
"One of the problems with diets is the first three letters spell 'die'"!! (smart lady..that is why I never use that 4 letter word)